I Loved Deeper

So I’ve struggled for some time. This whole blogging thing is me on some days and so not me on others. I like writing - when I have something to say. I actually resent the feeling that comes when I don’t have anything to say and then not writing. I don’t feel I really fall into that “mommy” niche that I enjoy reading. You know - the ones that can post everyday about all sorts of stuff that someone must find fascinating?

I mean, I find them fascinating, but I’m pretty sure that there’s just not that many people excited to see which four legged slimy creature my youngest put in my couch today.

So, with that, I’m going to be changing the purpose of this blog. I’m in process of founding an organization - one to gather up my minions (friends and acquaintances) and put them to work making our tiny piece of world a better place. I figure this domain can have a part in that.

You will see, over the course of the next week, all old posts disappearing. The face will change here and sometime in the next two weeks, something new appearing. Let this be a place of inspiration and positivity. Because at the end of the day, even amidst of my house-full-of-boys-and-frogs chaos, I think we could all use a little bit of the brighter side of life.

Stay tuned.

I don’t know when. I also stopped seeing my friends regularly. And working out. And taking pictures. And well, doing anything that’s really “me”. I mean seriously… I haven’t touched my camera in over a month. That’s just not right in my world.

So a few reminders for me that when I want to, I can write and that just maybe, maybe, I have something worthwhile to say:

I Want to be Running

Glass Houses

Just like Dachau, no birds fly at ground zero

And the boy said, my daddy saved me

Memory Monday, Dirty Hands - Grandpa Carney

Who I am, or rather, who I’ve decided to be

The Greatest Gift I opened today was my freedom (legitimately, the best writing in this piece, was not my own)

How to die, or rather, how to live

In regards to living one’s life full of vigor, not fear

The first roller coaster ride

Why I love having boys

In my daughter’s eyes

Life with Boys

Maybe I just need to find myself again.

So, I have a friend, Firemom. She likes a photograher who’s business runs under the name Allura Modern. Michelle Black is the photographer’s name and she creates all sorts of yummy goodness for photo fiends like me that you can find on her website and her blog.

I invested a bit of cash last year and bought a bunch of her actions and textures and have had such fun. Today, on her blog, she listed some sales (two of them good for today only). I partook! And for under 40$ (30 of which was already sitting in paypal account), I got two sets of textures (industrial and sky) and her Holiday Bundle.

I’m a lucky girl. Both for getting to take part in this community we call blogging (Thank you Firemom) and for people with such amazing talent as Michelle Black.

And just for fits and shiggles, one of my most recent photos using her techniques and textures:

See all my Thankful Days.

Yes, I’m thankful for an empty box of Heggy’s candy. Specifically, that someone gave me the box and that I got to make it all empty, all by myself.

Jon brought me an entire pound of Heggy’s Almond Caramels from Alliance. It’s a candy store there - mom and pop, all homemade goodness. Considering I haven’t been to Ohio in over a year, you can guess, I haven’t gotten to have any. It’s a treat. He was nice.

I’d love to show you a picture of the delectable treat in question, but I ate every last one of them before I realized. (Keep in mind I just got the box on Monday morning):

See all my Thankful Days.

I currently have 8 working computers in my house. One was inherited from a previous job. One was given to me years ago by one friend. Another was a gift from a friend (ie: they were too archaic for said friend to use, so they gave them to me). Two belong to Jonathan. Two (the best ones) were inherited from Bahram. Over the years, between my tech savvy and that of my friends, we’ve manged to make them workable and keep them working.

The best one was given to me by Bahram for the purpose of trading. A couple of months ago, we had a bad stormed that fried not only the surge protector, but also something in the computer. Now, only one of the USB ports works and even with a hub, all my USB connections are unreliable. Currently, I cannot use the printer/scanner with it. I can only access my external drive (where all my photos are stored), about half the time and only if I hold the connector, my little toe and my lips the right way at the same time. Add to it that I realized this weekend that I cannot run my trading software and Photoshop at the same time.

I could deal with the holding my lips right and my big toe pointed North issue, but I cannot work efficiently if I can’t run my two most important pieces of software simultaneously. Well, it can be done, but I would be unable to spend any time with my family, if I’m spending twice as much time working.

So, my brand spanking new, sparkly and never used or touched by man, made especially to my specifications, Dell will be here by the 15th. Merry Christmas to ME!!!!!! It’s a quad core, 4 times the memory of anything I’ve ever had hog and will make me happier and more productive than Jesus himself holding a flame thrower below my butt.

And I know it. I’m very grateful for the advantages I’ve been given considering what the world is going through.

But darn it, I’m excited! For the first time ever, in my entire life, I’ll have a brand new computer! (And matching dual 24″ monitors - OMG - photoshop heaven!)

Today? I’m thankful for: Inspiron 518, Core 2 Quad Q6600 (2.4GHz, 2×4MB); 4GB DDR2 SDRAM, 800MHZ - 4×1GB, DIM, M; 500GB Serial ATAII Hard Drive (7200RPM), 2 24inch Widescreen Flat Panel Monitors.

I am not thankful for being such a geek that I know why all those numbers are uber-super cool.

Well, maybe I am just a little bit.

See all my Thankful Days.